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My Father, My Hero

January 19, 2010

Now don’t get me wrong.  My husband is my hero too – just a different type.  My Dad, though?  His words of wisdom are what has prompted me to go public again with my blog.

I explained everything that has happened the week before the end of the contest to my folks at different times.  To my Mom, when I called her before the Dorchester results came out – to my Dad, after a playoff game – Dallas vs the Chargers (who handed the Cowboys their asses.)  It was good timing on my part.

The first thing he said is to forget about it all.  Don’t hide and wonder why.  Accept the fact that I am now a public figure and all that entails.  That it was not important to be “right” when the timing of a bad review was posted publicly, but to embrace the fact that since I’m out there, and so is my book, that I can’t ever respond even if I think something smells fishy.

He never questioned my ethics – he knows my ethics – but he did point out that others will not see things as clearly when they only see parts of the pieces and that I since I can’t change it I need to rise above and forget it all.  He even brought up the bad publicity quote I already used.  Having anybody talk about me is exactly what I want – and then he told me why.

Back in the late 90’s my father started his own company with a partner.  They had a great product and were branching out with a revolutionary concept that used existing technology in an untried way.  Sound familiar? 😉 Their first big client was Fox News. His company was still a very small fish, but the biggest in the pond started bad-mouthing them and saying their product was crap. It got them more clients.  People heard of them and word spread.

He opened up to me in a way he had never before.  I heard about all the ups and downs of his company and the path that eventually led to him no longer owning it and how it is now the most profitable section of a much larger company. I’ll spare you the details, but it was a great story and I’m glad he shared it with me.

Lastly, he advised me to not wear my heart on my sleeve in my blog. I’m not sure I can do that because all of this is so very personal to me – I’m not just selling my book, I’m selling me. That’s something I’ve done for years and something I’ve always done with total honesty. But I will try.

I never sold a mortgage to anyone that they couldn’t afford, never rented a unit to someone who couldn’t afford it (or had tenants that defaulted and trashed the place) and I never sold a house to someone and had them hate me afterwards.  I’m good at building relationships and to do that well I’ve always presented myself as me – to do otherwise would have been too much work.

But I will scale down how much of me I put out there.  My friends, who have been in  collective awe at how far I’ve come in such a short time, are encouraging me to write down all my steps – my successes and my failures as well.  They’re convinced that it could help other aspiring writers trying to make it and that I could eventually sell my story.  I’m not so sure I agree, and after a few glasses of wine, I’m more convinced they are letting the wine talk and just saying nice things to me. Time will tell.

What I would like to do is thank that ill-timed reviewer on January 8th.  I’ve preached everywhere about accepting bad reviews graciously because that is what I’ve been doing every time someone shit cans my story for the past 9 months.  Her review came at a bad time and I had a knee jerk reaction to it – I took it as a personal attack because of the timing and have been lambasted over the Internet because of my reaction. It doesn’t matter if I’m right or not – what matters is my eyes have been opened up.

The flurry of discussion topics and comments like “she’s not the human being I thought she was” made me feel horrible – but that’s life.  This is a business and I’m in it to win it.  So come read my blog, check out my every move, talk about me online and question my motives without knowing the whole story – go ahead.  All of it means nothing in the long run. Readers are all that matter in this race and I’ve got ’em – in droves.

I’ve written a book that some people will hate and a lot more people will love.  It will succeed in this business because of one thing and one thing only – ME. And in the end it may be my unorthodox methods that help the next aspiring writer make it, not taking a back seat as so many more experienced writers do.

You just never know, now do you?

I’m back, baby!

2 Comments leave one →
  1. January 19, 2010 3:59 pm

    Oh man, I love it! Welcome back!! And yes, we missed you.

  2. January 19, 2010 7:25 pm

    Glad to see you keeping a great attitude!

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